The games we play

Obama knowingly lies (or misleads, you pick) about Romney’s Bain record.  Romney demands an apology.  Obama refuses to apologize.  Both sides run ads defending positions and lambasting the other side for his outrageousness.

Romney’s Republican critics criticize his demand for apology as weak.  Romney’s Democratic critics call him a felon and say he deserves it.

Rove weighs in on whether this is the nastiest campaign ever;  a Democratic comedienne offers sex to a Republican donor if he’ll switch sides; and Trump tweets in on what a loser the president is.

Meanwhile, Batman, dressed in black, is about to fight Bane, who is white.  And Spiderman’s sweet and gentle aunt and uncle–the uncle who is shot by a white criminal with a star on his wrist–are union members who no doubt vote Democrat.

CNN’s Erin Burnett, smoking hot but chapped she’ll never replace the Money Honey, darts to CNN, dropkicks the sentiments of CNBC and cloaks herself in the righteous but low rating politics of her new network as she tries to put a journalistic chokehold on Mitt Romney.  Judging from how she used to practically throw herself at private equity titans I’m sure the fact that Mitt is so 1999 (and married) must be somewhat offputting.  He’s got grandkids for crying out loud!

The twitter universe is abuzz that Obama just said you didn’t build what you’ve been getting up at 5:30 am to build since before the president was getting stoned.  And Luke Skywalker (Luke Skywalker!) has now come out to say that Romney isn’t human.  The trouble for Romney of course is that Luke of all people is somewhat of an expert on the matter.  Then again we’ve known for 30 years that he’s got some daddy issues.  Romney could appeal to the princess but after how she bailed on her Scientologist friend Mr. Travolta I can only imagine how she’d feel about Romney the Mormon.

Limbaugh says Obama hates America and Axelrod demands that Romney apologize for that one.  Meanwhile Jeremiah Wright in fact does hate America but John McCain and the New York Times say that’s absolutely off limits.  I want to know what Louis Farrakhan thinks about that.

And by the way, I still want to know what the president’s grades were in college.  Or better yet, can I read his ConLaw exam he wrote as a 1L at Harvard?  Bet he’s still got it in a box somewhere.

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